Back to Basics

Many great writers in their time wrote longhand. For quite a while after that, typewriters were the main form of literary writing. Now most of use use laptops or desktops. I'm sure there are even a couple of writers out there who use a tablet. Sometimes it can be nice to get back to the old forms of writing. I usually write out the first draft of a short story in a composition book, and just the other day I wrote out the first chapter of a book on the Civil War on a manual typewriter. But is it really the best idea?

• Fantasy: As long as you have The Writer's Complete Fantasy Reference, you should be okay without a computer. I recommend an electric typewriter to do the job, though, as it types just as fast as a computer for when inspiration strikes.
• Horror: If your horror is firmly rooted in history, then it might be good to have the internet at hand. Otherwise, go crazy! A manual typewriter or longhand would work best to give it an old-timey, slightly creepy feel.
• Science fiction: Write on a computer if it's hard SF, but if you don't care anymore use an electric typewriter.
• Historical fiction: If you feel confident that you know what you're talking about, feel free to use a manual typewriter. However, I recommend that you keep a few reference materials around in case you hit a dead zone.
• Mainstream fiction: You should do whatever you feel comfortable with. Sometimes not having the Internet around can be a blessing with a lack of distractions, but other times it may be the most natural to have a keyboard.
• Memoirs: Whatever you can write the fastest with. It's much easier to write a memoir when you just clear your mind and think of your life. I don't think pen and paper is the best choice, though, because it's much too easy to get writer's cramp.
• Nonfiction: Unless you have Internet sources, you should be fine with some kind of typewriter.

Happy Belated Birthday, Douglas Adams!

March 11 would have been Douglas Adams's 61st birthday, had he not died of a heart attack in 2001. His work with The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is his most popular work, but everything that he has written involves a heavy hand of humor and whimsy that turned him into a hipster cult phenomenon. Who knows what he would have done had he been alive now?

Give the Dog a Biscuit

February 23 is National Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day! In honor of the holiday, I have a prompt. A man walks into a pet store with his Tamaskan Dog (hooray obscure dog breeds!) and they look around the dog treat section. The man picks one up and asks the Tamaskan, "What about this one?" The dogs says that it has too many calories and doesn't defend against tartar. A clerk comes over and asks if he's looking for anything specific, and the Tamaskan says to the clerk, "Yeah, this guy over here is all out of treats and he won't shut up about it! What kind of biscuit is right for humans?"

Take it from there.

Close Enough

This is wonderful.

January 18 is National Polygraph Day. I decided to give you, as a writer, another kind of test. The Mary-Sue Litmus Test. This is a test designed to figure out whether your character is guilty of being a Mary-Sue, or "perfect" character. There are three main types: average, who is perfect in every way, shape, and form; clone, which is the author inserting themselves into a main character; and trauma, who has had an undeserved amount of abuse, has infinite mental disorders, and uses that as an excuse to either do horrible things or cry in a corner the whole time.

The most in-depth and my favorite is http://www.springhole.net/writing/marysue.htm, but a close second is http://www.katfeete.net/writing/marysue.html. Please note that those two strictly apply to humanoid creatures. For a wolf one, I found http://quizilla.teennick.com/quizzes/8164465/the-mary-sue-test-wolf-versionrequired-for-entrance-to-ethereal. While it is supposed to be for entrance to a roleplay, you can still get a pretty accurate score.

If you're looking to find out if a whole race in your fantasy story is too perfect, you may be looking for http://www.springhole.net/writing/marysuerace.htm.

Tesla Time

Nikola Tesla: he's
probably thinking of how
to zap you.

January 10 is National Static Electricity Day, and while I don't have anything fun directly related to the topic, I do have something about a guy who worked with static electricity, as well as other forms of electricity, quite a bit: Nikola Tesla. Tesla first got interested in static electricity when his cat shocked him (something that happens to me quite a bit). He also invented a death ray, but he never used it.

So, what if he did use the death ray and started zapping things like crazy to get back at people? He would probably zap Thomas Edison first, as Tesla created the AC when working for Edison and demanded his $50,000 reward for completing it. Edison said that he was only joking about the money, so Tesla released AC to the public. Edison claimed it was unsafe and electrocuted animals to prove it, including cats such as the one that inspired Tesla in the first place.

Using that as a launching pad (recap: Tesla builds death ray, uses it on Edison, says "That's for the cats!"), what happens next?

The Oldest Rocks

The Blue Marble.

January 7 is Old Rock Day, so to celebrate let's take a look at some of the oldest rocks that we know altogether: the planets in our solar system. These are a few basic facts that would be found useful, and while I'm sure that you've looked these up at some time or another, it's a good place to keep all of them together so that in one quick look you can find out something.

I've recorded as much information as I could find pressed for time.

Mercury
Highest Temperature (0N/85N): 426.85/106.85 Celsius (800.33/224.33 Fahrenheit)
Lowest Temperature: -173.15/-193.15 Celsius (343.67/379.67 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature: 66.85/-73.15 Celsius (152.33/-99.67 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 88 days

Venus

Average Temperature: 462 Celsius (863.6 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 224.7 days


Earth

Highest Temperature: 57.8 Celsius (136.04 Fahrenheit)
Lowest Temperature: -89.2 Celsius (-128.56 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature: 14 Celsius (57.2 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 365 days


Mars

Highest Temperature: 35 Celsius (95 Fahrenheit)
Lowest Temperature: -143 Celsius (-225.4 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature: -63 Celsius (-81.4 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 687 days


Jupiter

Average Temperature (1 bar level): -108.15 Celsius (-162.67 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature (0.1 bar): -161.15 Celsius (-258.07 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 4,332.59 days


Saturn

Average Temperature (1 bar level): -139.15 Celsius (-218.47 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature (0.1 bar): -189.15 Celsius (-308.47 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 10,759 days


Uranus

Highest Temperature: -216.15 Celsius (-357.07 Fahrenheit)
Lowest Temperature: -224.15 Celsius (-371.47 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature: -220.15 Celsius (-364.27 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 30,799 days


Neptune

Average Temperature (1 bar level): -201.15 Celsius (-330.07 Fahrenheit)
Average Temperature (0.1 bar): -218.15 Celsius (-360.67 Fahrenheit)
Year (in Earth days): 60,190 days

Science Fiction Writing Prompts (First Installment)

No explanation needed.

While sci-fi isn't exactly my genre, I'm making an exception for today, as today (January 2nd, by my count) is National Science Fiction Day. So I'm channeling my inner H.G. Wells here, and don't hate on my approach to the genre. There are only specific things that I like.

1. You wake up from a deep sleep and get up out of your bed to find that you have antelope legs where you used to have human legs. Pushing your hair back there are also two horns. That's when you realize, pushing away your grogginess, that you are in some kind of laboratory, and there are three bull-headed guards blocking your escape. What do you do now?
2. In an alternative timeline, President James A. Garfield was never shot, as Charles J. Guiteau (his assassin) was too busy in his cult. (True story, look it up). He has turned the United States of America into a dictatorship, and you are yourself in 1884, during the height of his rule. What are you going to do? (If you come from another country, you are a general for the army of your country and need to figure out how to react to the new dictatorship).
3. Steampunk time travel time! You live in a Victorian-era period where someone has just invented time travel. You're the first person to test it out. So you go either backwards or forwards in time to change some major event in history, and then the button breaks, sending you to January 2, 2013. How is life different because of what you changed?